The View From Here

The other day a friend of mine posted on social media about all that’s happening at Wheaton College in IL . If you haven’t heard by now, it’s about the supposed conflation of Islam and Christianity by a tenured professor seeking solidarity with Muslims . Although I’m disappointed with the college's response, I’m hardly surprised considering how the institution has gotten into hot water about birth control and having fired a professor who converted to the Catholic faith . Add to it is their football team dressed up in KKK robes for a skit and a LGBT student leader who was attacked with an apple . So, frankly, even as Wheaton College has attempted to address the issues of racism, it is hardly the place for acceptance, understanding or empathy when it comes to diversity of any kind (except to evangelize them into the Kingdom of God through Jesus Christ). On the same posting, I wrote about how I, as an alum of the graduate school, decided over a year ago to remove myself from th

I have to admit that I've been pleasantly surprised to see two local theaters putting on plays about race and racism. One was at Trinity Rep , which was a collection of one minute plays called Every 28 Hours although unfortunately only for one night (sheesh, is that all we get?) What wasn't a surprise were the abundant negative comments about the plays, and that about ten or so subscribers canceled their membership at the theater. The artistic director of Trinity Rep wrote an editorial to respond to the trollers and detractors. Another beloved theater institution, the Gamm , is tackling race and racism with the play The Rant , which, thankfully, is being performed for a month. I haven't read the comments but I'm sure they won't be much different than they were for Every 28 Hours. Despite all the negativity from some sectors in the community, I'm grateful that these two major playhouses are willing to address these important topics through the power of

I used to work at a college that often hosts conferences and lecture series with speakers for which all of them are usually White and if lucky, perhaps a woman. What is disconcerting about the most current one is that the topic is  moral and ethical leadership in American society . Without saying a word, what's conveyed is that people of color nor women are leaders for this kind of leadership. It stuns me to think that they could not find ONE person of color to address this topic especially in light of the history of the Black church in Civil Rights both past and present. It's also interesting (and sad) that they have a White woman addressing millenials when this generation is one of the most racially and ethnically diverse to this day. The truth is that this college has a pattern of choosing all white speakers and makes me wonder if this is actually intentional. Ignorance can only go so far. However, I can't limit my critique to a Christian liberal arts college. I must

When my quantitative stats class (I know, it sounds horrific - at least to me!) started, the professor wasn't able to make it to the first session. Instead, the professor sent an assistant to go over the syllabus and so on. At the next class session, the professor walked in and lo and behold, the professor was (is!) a woman. Not only a woman but one who is younger. Even though one would presume that her first name would indicate a woman, I realized that my stereotype of a stats professor is of an older man overrode the somewhat obvious indicator that the professor was a woman. Malcolm Gladwell discussed in his book, The Tipping Point , the strength of stereotyping while also making clear how we can be intentional in changing stereotypes, which is often about exposure and engagement with difference. I found this be true as I spent more time with LGBTQQ colleagues and friends and had my stereotypes busted years ago. Even so, those moments that remind me of my own biases are such

Last month while waiting in line for the airport security check, I heard a child's voice and thought she may have been lost. Having young nieces as well as all the news reports of kidnappings of kids, well, I'm attuned to responding to kids who may seem lost. Rather than ignore, I usually try to find out who the kid "belongs" to and help locate the parent(s). So I turn to a woman that's near me in line and asked, "Is she with the wrong parents?" I know, a strange way to put it but it just came out my mouth that way. In any case, the woman glared at me and said in a cold voice, "Oh, she's with the RIGHT parents." I looked at her and saw that she was White and saw the child (who I didn't see before; I only heard her voice) who, guess what, was Black.  Yikes.  I clearly was misunderstood and I clearly offended her. I simply froze even as much as I wanted to apologize to her (I really wish now that I did). I'm sure she was thinki

It's rather disconcerting to realize that a person, and in this case a classmate, doesn't like me. Or at least that's my perception of a recent email sent by this classmate who that told me to "Stop emailing me" period (although there was a "please'"). I had no idea why the classmate thought it was a personal email as it was a group email to the class that we're taking. Perplexing. To be honest, it was hard to not take it personally for a moment. I mean, who doesn't like me ? Then I had to mentally take a step back, reflect and recognize that ultimately this wasn't about me. I won't go into my theories as to why I think this classmate doesn't like me but in the end it really doesn't matter. Rather, I'm seeing this an opportunity to practice mindfulness by acknowledging my feelings, taking a deep breath and letting go. I also see it as a metaphor for how I will face clients who won't like me for one reason or anoth

In one of my summer classes, I was conversing with some of my classmates about something and somehow #BlackLivesMatter came up. As you probably know by now, my posture towards such situations and realities is one of solidarity and compassion. So when I heard the classmate say that African Americans should simply "get over it," I was shocked into silence. The reason being is that this student was in a School Counseling program and I knew that this student would soon be (if perhaps already) working with students for which the majority will be Black and Brown kids. What was problematic was the tone of dismissal and an utter lack of understanding of the African-American and Hispanic experience of oppression and marginalization in the U.S. that continues to THIS DAY. It concerns me that this soon-to-be-graduate's attitude will perceive Black and Brown kids as simply not working hard enough to "get over" the experience of racism that is both personally experienced

Earlier this summer in one of my classes I was having a conversation with some of my classmates about who knows what but then the confederate flag comes up as a topic. I did what I could to listen without giving my opinion right away, which is something I've been trying to better these days. However, one classmate likened the removal of the confederate flag to ninja turtle costumes. Yup, ninja turtle costumes. Let me explain...she said that she felt that the immediate reaction of removing the confederate flag in South Carolina as being an over-reaction. She continued to say that if someone was wearing a ninja turtle costume while shooting people dead , it shouldn't mean we'd ban ninja turtle costumes. Thus, meaning that just because the shooter had photos of himself with the confederate flag doesn't mean the flag should be removed. **Mouth drops open** It was then that I couldn't not say something, and proceeded to tell her that the confederate flag has alway

A few weeks ago in a class focused on crossing cultures and diversity, my classmate turned to me and asked, "Why does race matter?" She asked this after I explained how Chinese adoptees when starting college are often confronted with the realities of their ethnic and racial identity. I have to confess that it was disconcerting to hear her ask such a question (or perhaps it was more of a statement) after weeks of studying and reading about diversity and about racism (and other -isms) and under the tutelage of a Black woman. Bottom line, cultural competence won't come from information or class assignments. Somehow, more must be done for those who are privileged and in the majority to develop an anti-racist identity by delving into who they are and how their racialized notions will make or break a therapeutic alliance. The fact that this classmate would discount the reality and importance of race makes me wonder how she can ever work with those who are different from her a

In one of my classes we were asked to take the Implicit Association Test , which is attempting to identify your implicit bias based on the speed of association of words with images. I had taken it years ago when Malcolm Gladwell wrote about it in his bestseller, The Tipping Point . The test that he took and got the most notice about race and the association of black with danger, negativity and so on. Frankly, I wasn't surprised by the results of my preferring White because of my upbringing in a majority White neighborhood and the reinforcement of radicalized notions in media, film, etc. of African Americans in US American society. What was interesting and disconcerting is to hear my classmates (majority White) discuss the test in terms how it didn't seem valid to them and that the results must be about muscle dexterity of their finger. On and on went the rationalizing of how the test can't possibly indicate their bias. It was essentially a collective denial of the realit

Last night in my human development across cultures class, we were asked to do a " multicultural circles identity " activity, which included sharing with one other classmate then with the class as a whole. I've done this myself several times as well as facilitated groups to do this activity. What I like about is that it's always with different groups of people and the ways that I identify myself change depending on where I'm at in that moment. For me, I included "female," "Chinese-American," "Christian/Catholic" and "Auntie." Although I often talk about my racial identity, this time I talked with my partner about my experience as an Auntie which has become more and more important to me. I told her how surprised I was on how much I cared for and loved these girls who were not my own and not even of our family blood as they're adopted. I'm struck by the reality and possibility of what we as humans can do by accepting

In the second summer session, I'm taking two classes - group counseling and human development across cultures. In the second class, the majority of the students are recent college graduates, White and female. This is actually more atypical compared to the classes I've taken thus far so it has been interesting to navigate my age-ism that kicks in. That is, I experience profound frustration when classmates don't speak up. All I can think is. "People, we're in graduate school and we're here to learn from each other. This isn't like an undergraduate classroom where you are fed information and you sit like lumps on a log." Yes, those are my judgmental thoughts and they bum me out. I don't like thinking this way but there you go. Then I was reminded that my classmates closer to my age do the same so I guess it isn't age-specific. Of course I also realize that talking about diversity is generally difficult for those who are in the majority. However,

Oh wow, the professor for my group counseling said "oppression" and "microagressions" in one sentence. These words were directed to educate the class about the necessity and value for groups that may be based on race or ethnicity because of the past and present experience of racial oppression and microagressions. What is remarkable is that she as a White straight woman said it with such ease and no hesitation. SHE. GETS. IT. Through her words and attitude, she fully embodied what it meant to be an ally for those of us are in the numerical minority and marginalized due to identity, status and/or circumstances. My sense of her is that she spent time and effort to self-educate, to experience and to make connections with people of many backgrounds to inform her understanding and increase her empathy. Also, I can imagine that her experiences as an older woman in our sexist (still!) and youth-obsessed society contributes to her ability to advocate and come along side

So, here I am having had taken six classes for my counseling graduate program and have yet to have one faculty of color or adjunct faculty member as an instructor. Then it finally happened..the instructor for my Human Development Across Cultures class is a woman of color. I confess that it felt odd and wonderful to have someone who was not White teaching a class. In fact I was almost gleeful. It's hard to explain how much it matters for me to have people, particularly those in authority and influence, around me who reflect my identity and/or experience. In fact, research tells us time and again that this kind of representation and connection increases students' interest, self-efficacy and ultimate success. Based on the fact that she was teaching the class I made the presumption that she will address  diversity in all its form as well as the realities of power, position and privilege. I was not disappointed as she started with the TED talk about the "danger of a single st

What happened in Charleston yesterday was horrific. There are truly no words to describe what happened except that I'm even more demoralized by the state of affairs in the US when it comes to race. Even though I'm not surprised per se because of the amount of racial hatred in the US has been on-going from the founding of this nation, I'm still shocked. Yet what is as upsetting to me is that colleges and universities that are PWIs continue to have diversity and anti-racism efforts on the sidelines at their campuses. Then they wonder why bias incidents occur and faculty of color leave. Honestly, when one campus has a student putting a swastika on another student's dorm door  (who happens to be Muslim) then having a security officer tell the victim that he should be glad he's not a Jew is appalling. Another campus for which the president outright rejects his one Black faculty member's exhortation to not continue having ALL WHITE conferences and ALL WHITE speak

This past week in class we were discussing a case study about a Nisei and his struggles. A Nisei is a 2nd generation Japanese American. What struck me (again) is how very unaware that most of my classmates were about Japanese American culture and the generational impact of the WWII internment in the US. Many said that they didn't feel they "knew" the client enough because there wasn't enough information about his feelings and his habits. I felt I knew plenty based on what was NOT said knowing that Japanese culture is high context and indirect . One older classmate made a comment that the Japanese-American man took the "easy way out" when it came to his academic studies and choosing courses that assured success. Hearing her say that was like a slap across the face as her statement was definitive and filled with moral judgment. I had to (of course!) correct her on this, which just reminded me again that I'm the only one in my class who could speak to th

When I was working at a PWI (Primarily White Institution) in Santa Barbara, I thought it was going to be okay. Part of it was due to my still being ignorant about the dynamics of race and my own identity. I had glimpses of understanding when I was in graduate school at another PWI west of Chicago but not enough to propel me towards true cultural competence. Also, it was California! The land of diversity (so I thought) where I could find every kind of food within a few square miles and that Asian Americans were found outside of Chinatown and other urban spaces. So different from Boston! Hooray! Well, not so much. One encounter ----One day a staff member and me were talking on the steps facing the library and frankly I can't recall exactly what we were discussing. BUT, I remember this...she told me that TRUE Americans speak English meaning no English as a Second Language or even a distinguishable accent. All I could think, "Do you have any idea who you're talking to?&quo

The other night in class, an interesting statement was made by a classmate about identity, bias and prejudice. The classmate made clear that her identity was gay and that it would seem easier to have her identity more open so the bias and discrimination she experienced would be more obvious. Certainly there are challenges and pain when it comes to feeling the need as well as the very real necessity of hiding one's identity. At the same time being a person of color for which my features are identified as such doesn't make the experience of bias and discrimination easier. In fact it can be frightening when racism rears its head and physically and/or emotionally threatens a person's life. Yet what's interesting is that as a person who is Asian-American, I am both visible and invisible. Visible in the way people address me as if I'm a foreigner in my own country and invisible because Asians are supposed to be submissive and quiet. I can't tell you how many times I

For the next few days or weeks I'll be writing about my experiences as a former staff of color  having worked at Primarily White Institutions (PWIs). I named my posting as being a POW in a PWI to describe the experience of feeling emotionally and mentally imprisoned at a PWI. I'm particularly thinking of Japanese-Americans who were forced into internment camps in THEIR OWN COUNTRY during WWII and having to face once again the racism that came with being Asian. It is deeply disconcerting and disturbing to be seen as foreign and alien in one's own country of origin; thus the title of the blog. This video pretty sums up my life from East Coast to West Coast and all places in between: Disclaimer: This is not meant to discount the experiences of those who were POWs.I was once interrogated for several hours for two days by the Chinese Authorities in Wuhan, China in 1993; Even so I would not even compare my experience to those who were imprisoned during war.

Right now I'm taking a short break from reading my textbook for my Vocational Counseling summer class. So far it has been rather interesting and helpful. I had no idea that there were actual theories that framed the work of career counselors. I now have more respect for those who do this work day in and day out especially in a college/university context. In this particular chapter I'm reading about "Adult Career Crisis and Transitions" and the paragraph that I finished reading was about "Persistent Occupational Problems." I couldn't help but think of my friend who recently resigned from his tenured faculty position at a small liberal arts college. For over ten years he was the only Black male professor at a faith-based PWI (Primarily White Institution) and as time went on, the campus culture became increasingly oppressive and uninviting. In the end this campus culture not only drove him to an occupational crisis and non normative transition , his healt

In the past month there has been news about the place I had worked regarding racial profiling by the security officers. As a result there was a rally but this isn't the first time this has happened. There was a rally there two years ago about the same issue and reality about racial profiling of students, staff and faculty of color. There's much to comment on but I will focus mine about the statements made about how there has been "only one" formal report in the past two years by one faculty of color, which must mean there is no problem, right? Well, that's no different than saying that there have been no reported sexual assaults and rapes (and unfortunately there are many campuses who report such statistics) so that must mean it can't be happening on our campus. I believe that many would say that such a statement is ignorant at best and outright false at the worst. For those who made such comments haven't thought about how the bias incident protocol

It's hard to believe that I just ended my last day at my graduate assistant job. I also find it hard to believe how different the ending is as compared to what I imagined at the start of the academic year. I thought for sure that I'd be gritting my teeth until the very end but that hasn't been the case. I'm not quite sure at what point things began to change although I can definitely put my finger on when I started seeing a therapist to specifically address workplace difficulties. Once I did, I was gently encouraged or even challenged to reconsider my thoughts, which in turn affected my feelings. Once I began to release some of the thoughts and feelings I had, my actions and attitudes were less defensive. This doesn't mean the people I was working for were any less mean or hurtful but when I began to recognize that much of what they said to me was not personal, I actually did feel better. At the same time I can't help but be reminded how very subordinate I am

It's hard to know where to start when it comes to Baltimore, Ferguson, etc. etc. All I can muster is sadness, not even anger. I'm truly wondering how much it will take for a real change in policing and those who are supposed to "serve and protect." Now, it is not an unknown fact that communities of color have not experienced such service or protection for generations as racism continues to infect institutions and individuals. There has been minimal progress in diversifying the police force across the US, which crops up in the news now and again when there is a discrimination lawsuit of some sort. I liken this to lynching in the US in that it took nearly ninety years and nearly 4,000 African-American victims before laws were changed in the US. It's disheartening to think it may take just as long before institutional change is made. And even when it does change we continue to struggle with the realities of racism that affect all of our lives and to the detriment

One of my favorite shows is The Mindy Project . I "discovered" the show a few months ago so it took me a couple of weeks to catch up on three seasons but it was definitely worth it! Now, there is one doctor, Jessica, that particularly intrigued me because she is a recovering hoarder. I googled to see if there was any commentary about this character played by Julia Stiles but surprisingly there wasn't anything to be found. So, I'll add my two cents... Hoarding is a serious disorder that continues to be misunderstood by the general public. These days people who have hoarding disorder is fodder for reality shows  or a show like The Mindy Project. In some ways I can imagine that these shows provide a level of normalization so people may have a better understanding and hopefully more empathy. On the other hand such shows can act to mock and  misrepresent the severity of the disorder. Regarding Dr. Jessica (she doesn't seem to have a last name) in The Mindy Projec

Ah, it's a beautiful Spring day in Providence, Rhode Island! I think we may have turned a corner in having cold and chilly weather. Even if we did, it's not snow so hooray for even gloomy days in April. So I sit here with all the windows wide open with fresh air pouring into my abode. I'm also sitting here reflecting on life in general and one thing keeps popping up from last semester so here I go... Last semester in my classes I'm learning about theories...alot of them. Now, I'm not one who leans towards anything theoretical, philosophical or theological. I'm a senser ("S") based on my MBTI which means I rely on my senses to take in information. Thus it takes me a bit longer to "get" the big picture although I definitely keep it in mind when it comes to my life choices. In one class, we were learning about CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) and the premise is that if you change what you think about something, emotions and behavior shou

Ahh, conferences. In so many ways I love going to conferences. I learn so much from workshops, I get inspired by keynote speakers and I get to visit locales that I never would have, e.g. New Orleans, Minneapolis, and so on. In fact not too long ago I returned from a conference that was in Orlando, which is a wonderful respite from the LONG winter in New England. At the same time, conferences are difficult for someone like me who is an introvert. Of course what's always interesting to me is that people insist I'm not an introvert because I am sociable and a good conversationalist. This begs the question, "What do people think introverts are or do? A rock hiding under rocks?" Anyway, as an introvert I've come to accept that my energy stores will be somewhat depleted when I get home. Yet I've learned to navigate the very extroverted spaces at conferences by connecting with other attendees one on one, walking through the resource expos on my own, staying in a

Last night in class we watched a videotape (yes, a videotape like in a VCR) that was to highlight how we make conclusions based on first impressions, body language, and so on. Essentially it was getting at how we can and do stereotype and how that can affect our ability to assess and treat clients. The videotape was about a show episode to guess who the real person was, i.e. there was one truth teller and two posers.  The person they were guessing was a Mr. Martinez who was a bilingual barber bookseller.  First of all I had issues with the show itself stereotyping by having all three people being Latino and "looking" Latino.  As I have already discussed being Latino (according to the US census) is a cultural marker not racial in that facial features and such do not indicate this identity.  Yet, we racialize this identity as the following proves... So, we have three Latinos who are stereotypically looking Latino (olive skin, dark hair, etc.) and we find out that the last p

A few months ago I decided from now on to only see plays if there's a person of color.  Again, I'm fully aware of the complexity of race and what does it mean to "see" race but let's be honest, I feel most of us know what we're talking about when it comes to under-representation.  I feel there should at least be an effort to include the most apparent and salient aspects of diversity in our nation with, again, the understanding there is intersection of identities. Thus, the other night I went to see " The Glass Menagerie" at Trinity Rep  in Providence. Well, the play has an African-American woman playing the role of Laura, which is a refreshing change.  If you didn't know, in theatre circles there is the on-going debate of the idea of "purity" in hiring actors for specific roles, e.g. Romeo and Juliet need to be White and European.  It can go both ways in that White actors have been hired to play roles specifically for people of color

For the past few weeks I've been following the new show, " Fresh Off the Boat ," which is about an Asian American family living in Orlando.  As far as I can tell, the parents seem to be first generation arriving in the US and the kids are first generation born in the US.  I have to say that hearing the title made me think of how I heard the term growing up near Boston's Chinatown.  To be frank it was a word that ABCs (American Born Chinese) used to disparage those who were recent immigrants in the US.  Then again, my parents and family friends often called the ABC kids as " jook sing " which can be interpreted as "empty bamboo."  This was not a compliment but rather a descriptor of their children (me!) that though we looked Chinese outside, we really were void of our cultural underpinnings like language, food, etc. So, I have mixed feelings about the show as it reinforces some stereotypes especially about the mom. Then again, I'm often surpri

Not too long ago I found out that an alum of a college I used to work at was being promoted into a significant position, and I thought it'd be great to have the news about him be part of the college's list of on-line articles about alumni news.  When I asked the college about this, I was told that they had actually been tracking this alum's career and have been wanting to interview him but he did not respond to their initial inquiry.  So I offered to follow-up and I did. Well, it turns out that, yes, this alum received their inquiry and though he was open to being interviewed, he wasn't so sure they were open to hearing what he had to say.  And it was no surprise that he said that he would have both very good things to say and some tough things to say about his experiences at the college,  I suppose this is true for most alum of any college in that one has mixed experiences as an undergraduate.  Yet it is particularly true for those who are marginalized due to race, s

To get the pulse of any campus, I like to read the school paper.  It's interesting to note that though technology is taking over much of our lives, the weekly or even daily college school paper continues to be on, well, paper. Earlier this week I picked up the paper at the college that I'm attending for graduate school and work at part-time.  In it was a response editorial by the paper's editor about her consternation about last week's guest editorial about #blacklivesmatter . The editor was particularly upset about the idea that we in the present are responsible for the past.  I quote the editor in full: "After reading the #BlackLivesMatter article I was annoyed and angered. The author was taking things that happened before we were even born and using them against everyone alive today.  There has been much oppression in our country's history.  When the Irish came over they were scrutinized and kicked out of buildings.  they were passed up on jobs and made fu

Last night my boyfriend and I were having a discussion about the problem of race and being Latino/Hispanic.  This is not a new conversation for us considering my past work in diversity in higher education and his academic teaching on Latin American and Latino US American politics. Depending on who you talk to, being Hispanic/Latino can be racially framed, i.e. being "brown" or culturally framed, e.g. being "Mexican" or "Cuban."  All of this got a bit complicated when in 1980 the US government decided to change the way census demographics would be noted and collected. So instead of being of being Hispanic, one must choose a race (White, Asian, etc.) and Hispanic or Non-Hispanic. I've often talked to friends who are Hispanic/Latino and they lament the fact that it was not racial category especially when it is racialized and they experience the racialization every day through stereotyping, microagressions and outright racism because of features deemed

For my graduate class I'm doing a practicum in the local area.  Due to all the snow I've only gone in twice but so far it has been a good experience.  Much of it is because majority of the staff are people of color.  In my entire life this is the first time I've ever entered into a workplace and most of the people are those of color.  In this case they're also mostly women.  Also most if not all were either pursuing their Master's degree or already had one.  Having lunch with them and listening to their stories encouraged my heart and sustained me for the rest of the day. That's what happens when you're among those who are like-minded yet are different in so many ways. The expression "Unity in Diversity" really can be true. Yet the truth is that I know that when these women are out and about, they are probably presumed to be drop-outs, illegal or poor simply based on what they look and sound like.  I also know that I don't get any of that be

It's really true that I find myself being the only one in most contexts in Rhode Island.  In some ways that makes perfect sense since the state is nearly 87% White  but I can't help still being surprised when I experience this alone-ness time and again. Today I attended a workshop about trauma, which was helpful since I'm going to be working with clients who have experienced alot of trauma in their lives.  As I looked around the room, there was one other visibly person of color in attendance.  Again, no surprise but always disconcerting to say the least. This experience outside of what I used to do in higher education reminds me that diversity is just hard in the many places I find myself in.  Yet, if not me or you or someone else then change won't ever happen.  The question that haunts me though is how do those who are always breaking ground able to be resilient and have fortitude in the face of oppression and resistance.  I'm still wondering about it.

Last week I scored a free ticket to see " Middletown " at the Trinity Repertory Company in Providence, RI. I was looking forward to seeing this play as it seemed that they would have a touch more racial diversity in their casting.  Also the story line seemed thought-provoking in that it was considered to be a contemporary "Our Town" set in a small town and addressing as written on their web page, "universal themes of love, birth, death, loneliness, elation, forgiveness, disappointment and redemption." Again, I found myself being one of a handful of people of color in the audience and certainly one of the younger audience goers.  This definitely is a reality for so many theatres when it comes to the lack of diversity in age and race among audiences.  The only time that I was in the racial majority was when I went to see " Raisin in the Sun " with Denzel Washington, which was refreshing to experience. Then again, is anyone surprised by that? A

The other day I went to my niece's cello recital.  I'm guessing that your mental image may be much like mine in that the students who were performing that day will be mostly Asian American and perhaps mostly female.  It's not that I want it to be that way but media in the US has propagated the image of cute Asian kids who were prodigies playing violins like Antonio Vivaldi . The funny thing is that though I tried to learn the violin at the age of eight, I lasted about a week to the consternation of my mom. It was more about the expense of buying the violin than the disappointment of a supposed " Tiger Mom ." So, imagine my surprise when I walked into the room and saw only three Asian kids out of a dozen and mostly boys who were poised and ready to play their cellos.  It was a good reminder that stereotypes don't really hold up as much as our society likes to believe that they do.  Next time when someone says that stereotypes have a "grain of truth"

Last night I went to get my monthly massage, which was especially soothing after shoveling snow for nearly two hours earlier in the day.  As you can imagine, I was so looking forward to being in a quiet space and allow a skilled masseuse to knead away the knots in my shoulders, back and neck. Imagine my consternation when the massage therapist upon hearing my last name began to speak an Asian foreign language to me. "OMG, really?" I thought and "Not again. Damn!"  Even if he spoke my family language which is Cantonese Chinese, I still wouldn't understood a word he said. I actually had to ask him what he was saying to me and he proceeded to say he was speaking Korean as he presumed my last name was Korean. Okay, so I get that person may presume some things based on a last name but let's be honest. Would he begin speaking Italian to a client whose name was Bellini or Gaelic to someone who was O'Hara? I will bet all the money in the world that he would

I(Note: I wrote this from a previous blog posting for another blog moderated by Dr. Omedi Ochieng.) From https://amongtheevangelicals.wordpress.com/2015/01/24/slouching-towards-apartheid/?blogsub=confirming#subscribe-blog : Slouching Towards Apartheid The magic number is 2050. In 2050 the demographics in the U.S. will change dramatically from being majority White to majority people of color. In fact I’ve heard it many times over that 1 out of 2 U.S. Americans in 2050 will trace their ancestry to either being Hispanic or Asian. The truth is that some states have already seen a major change and most particularly California. Now, I’ve also heard as a result of this change that racism will come to a halt. Some say it’s out of pure practicality and others say it’s just inevitable. Yet I’m not convinced of either sentiment especially since the power brokers in the US continue to be White, Non-Hispanic and male. In fact our nation may very well go the way of Apartheid South Africa if

The other day my boyfriend and I were driving through his town in New Jersey and we noticed that the car in front of us had a sticker of the Italy flag.  He remarked that if it was a flag of Mexico that the person in the car would be considered probably undocumented or at least not a "true" American, i.e. one who is assimilated into Whiteness.  I can't help but agree with him on his comment.  If one has a flag that is of European origin then it must mean that the person is proud of his/her roots and ethnic heritage.  And that's seen as acceptable.  Even if the person spoke the language of those roots, s/he still wouldn't get the same kind of denigration for a person of certain backgrounds that's deemed as potentially "illegal" or certainly shameful.

Today I had an "aha" moment. A moment of recognition that I wasn't the only one; thus it's not about me.  An earlier post I wrote about a supervisor and today I discovered that this supervisor got chewed out as well.  Meaning that sometimes what I get from others may be a result of their previous experiences that has shaped their attitude and approach.  That doesn't mean we excuse people for bad behavior yet uncovering an explanation can be helpful in my attitude and approach. Rather than allow crap to flow down to the next person, maybe it's better to have it end with me and just flush it away and move on.

Although I've written about this before I had to comment again about my observation of how very White (and elderly) is the audience for theatre or at least theatre in Rhode Island. The other day I went to see a play at the Gamm theatre and I was able to count on one hand the number of people of color in the audience.  Of course we know that race is a complex concept and reality so one can't necessarily see color based on the categories created in the US through law and imagination. Then add to it that Hispanic is not considered a race category but ethnicity per the US government or the fact that last names can belie a person's background as well as those who are multiracial and defy categorization altogether. Barring all this, one can't deny how very White it is in the audiences of theatre as well as on stage among the actors. I'm beginning to think I need to attend productions that support more diversity as much as I love the Gamm and other theatres in the area. 

Every day I receive a meditation from the Henri Nouwen Society to reflect upon. Nearly a week ago there was one about gratitude  but really, it was more about being grateful for the things that don't go well in our lives, my life.  Although this is not a new idea for me as a person who believes in the idea and reality of redemption, i.e. turning bad stuff into a meaningful stuff, it seemed apropos to have received this a few days before returning to my job for the semester. As you know, I wrote about how my supervisor told me I wasn't doing a good job and how it sucked for me to hear that; but more than that it was hearing her criticism in such a way that made me feel denigrated.  After some reflection I'm recognizing some of the good that's coming from the job and to even be grateful.  This has definitely helped my attitude towards the work I had to do last week and will continue doing this semester. This is of course not to say that anyone should put up with abusi

Okay, did anyone notice how White the academic award nominees are for this year?  Apparently I wasn't the only one per Huffington Post . When I see this I'm both saddened and not surprised at the same time.  It baffles me that many will continue to maintain we are in a post-racial society when race (and gender and so on) continue to play out in the most powerful institutions in the U.S. -- Hollywood, Business, Government and Education.  The stats are there to reinforce the reality of little to no representation and the continued bias and discrimination that exists at all levels. Thinking it's time for to stop going to the movies until things begin to change. It's a miniscule step but it's a step nonetheless.

Tonight I went to the local supermarket and as I was having my food scanned, I observed an interesting interaction between the cashier and a customer.  The customer was inquiring about the cashier's name then declared that it was a good "African" name.  Now, you have to know that this is coming from an older African gentleman speaking to a person who has dark skin.  She proceeded to tell him in a diplomatic way that she was neither African nor her name. Yet he continued to state that her name sounded "African" and that it was a compliment to her by stating so. As the cashier was scanning my items, she began to share some of her feelings with me and let me know that she was half Indian and that her name was actually made up by her parents; thus no African origin at all.  I told her how often people presume I'm a foreigner because of how I look when in fact my family has been here since the 40s and I was born and bred in the US. This brief encounter remind

Okay, so this morning I went to get the mail and guess what? My AARP card finally arrived. For those who are not in the know, AARP = A merican A ssociation for R etired P ersons. Even though I still have another 20 years of work ahead of me I figured I might as well as enjoy the benefits of being older.  Yes, benefits, which are (in my mind): Really not caring what other people think when it comes to my body, my choices, and my preferences. Giving in to the necessity to be moderate in exercising rather than intense workouts that tend to cause me soreness and even pain. Appreciating more and more my boyfriend who is 12 years my junior. Not feeling the need to get married - ever. Having longer hair even as I'm losing some of it. Re-inventing myself by returning to graduate school for a new vocation. Discounts! Wearing sunblock because I want to reduce my chances for skin cancer and not wrinkles. Releasing people in my life who make little to no effort to nurture our frie

It's hard to believe but I'm actually googling "menopause" these days. And why? Well, I finally realized that perhaps there was a reason for the combination of symptoms that included heat flushes, hair loss, difficulty sleeping, belly and upper arm fat(ter), and so on.  At first I thought that some of this especially my weight re-distribution was because I wasn't working out hard enough or not eating enough veggies.  This realization reminded me how often as women we blame our health issues on our inability to do things whether it's exercise, maintain a healthy weight, eat my veggies, etc. Yet the reality is that whatever that may be ailing me could be out of my control and can well be just part of life. Of course it doesn't mean slacking off from doing what is healthier. Then I read an article by a menopausal woman who said she hasn't eaten a carb since 2009 because of the pressure to have a flat belly. Really? Frankly I've chosen a long time to

Last weekend I visited friends in Washington DC, which, by the way, has become one of my favorite cities.  One of my goals was to see the MLK Memorial along the tidal basin across from the Jefferson Memorial.  So, on a warm and even humid Sunday morning I made my way to the memorial. While walking along the path, I heard different languages and saw individuals, couples and families of all backgrounds.  It doesn't surprise me considering how DC is the seat of power in the United States as well as all the remarkable monuments and museums that were free to attend. What was and is always interesting to me that people take it for granted in a good way that this is how it is, i.e. to be surrounded by diverse people and that there is no threat or fear because someone is different.  This is particularly important considering all that has happened in Paris in the last 48 hours with the terrorist attacks in the city.  Too often we are quick to blame an entire people for the violent acts of